Not today, Dave

I thought I was writing about this thing at the Salesforce Dreamforce conference, and I was, but it turns out I was writing about something else, more. Plus 7 other things worth your time.

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“The walk over here was the longest of my life,” Judd Hirsch once said to a woman in a 1983 episode of Taxi. “But the walk back will be even longer if you don’t smile.”

Not the worst line ever, I guess, but it doesn’t work out for Hirsch’s character.

The woman he wants to meet shoots him down. When he persists, she sprays him in the eye with Binaca.

Ahh, the ‘80s.

It’s funny that I remember that. It’s funny how your mind works.

I probably saw the scene once—a rerun during high school, decades ago. Yet the 10-second line has stayed with me all these years.

An old friend sent me an email:

Hey man, how's things? Today's the 10 year anniversary of Dave's passing. Can't believe he's been gone that long. I remember when you called and just hearing the tone in your voice and knowing what had happened even before you said it.

I had two close friends in high school: John and Dave.

Dave died young. John wrote the email above.

I wouldn’t have predicted Dave’s future back then. Among the three of us, he’d been the athlete—the muscular guy who took fitness and nutrition very seriously. You wouldn’t have wanted to mess with him.

One Friday night in high school, the three of us were walking on Thayer Street in Providence, R.I. We liked going there. Record stores, fast food, people. Lots of girls.

(Lots of my weak version of: “The walk over here was the longest of my life…”)

I hadn’t mellowed yet, and this one night, I got into an argument with some other guy from some other school.

I have no idea what it was about, but I remember Dave stepped in, got me out of it with my teeth still intact.

Later, he was highly amused. He told me: "If you're going to keep mouthing off to people like that, I'd better keep lifting weights."

It’s funny that I remember that. It’s funny how your mind works.

I read an idea that people die three times: when their body stops working, when they’re buried, and after the last time anyone says their name.

Not today, Dave.

Dave. Dave. Dave. Dave. Dave.

7 other things worth reading

  1. What do the U.S. secretaries of state and defense, and many other Trump administration officials have in common? They all went to West Point together: class of 1986. (Politico)

  2. The attorney general of D.C. is suing Doordash, saying it’s been stealing its workers’ tips. (CNBC)

  3. 9 years later, Swedish prosecutors dropped the rape charges that led Julian Assange to spend years seeking asylum and living in the Ecuadorian embassy in London. (He’s still in custody pending extradition to the U.S.) (Yahoo.)

  4. The people who bought Sports Illustrated insist they didn’t buy a business, they bought a brand. (Vox.)

  5. A prosecutor who allegedly used his own daughter as bait to catch an alleged predator now could face child endangerment charges of his own. (The Washington Post)

  6. I love Aruba. They country’s tourism board is now pushing an “election disconnection” package to get Americans out of the U.S. prior to the 2020 election. (Business Insider)

  7. A vegan customer is suing Burger King for cooking meatless Impossible Burgers on the same grills they use to cool traditional meat burgers. (NBC News)

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