We don't talk anymore
New study: We speak literally 123,370 fewer words per year than we did just a few years back.
One thing to know about me is that I talk to everyone, all the time.
Last summer, my family stayed at a motel on Cape Cod for a few days. On the first morning, we desperately wanted coffee. I remembered there was a pot going all the time in the front office, so I volunteered to go.
That was around 8:00 a.m. At 9:30, my wife came looking for me—and found me deep in conversation with the woman behind the counter:
How she came to work at a motel …
Where she was from, other jobs she’d had, how Cape Cod had changed …
Her relationship with her kids …
I got caught up, as always happens. In fact, I have a business called Life Story Magic (you may have heard of it?), where the entire point is to interview people’s parents and grandparents on video to capture their life stories—because I love having conversations.
It turns out that I am apparently an even bigger outlier than I realized, and that the gap between me and everyone else is only getting wider.
Researchers at the University of Missouri-Kansas City and the University of Arizona analyzed audio recordings from 2,197 people between the ages of 10 and 94 across 22 studies conducted between 2005 and 2019, and found something that surprised even them.
Each year during that period, people spoke an average of 338 fewer words per day than the year before.
Over the full span, daily spoken words dropped about 28 percent, from roughly 16,600 to about 11,900.
Published in Perspectives on Psychological Science, the data was originally buried in a larger paper on gender differences in talkativeness. The researchers themselves almost missed it.
Multiply 338 fewer words per day times 365 days. That works out to 123,370 fewer spoken words per year.
That’s roughly the word count of To Kill a Mockingbird, Wuthering Heights, or the first Twilight novel.
Each year, the conversations we’re no longer having would fill a novel.
As I told the researchers in an email (asking to get the full text of their study and taking advantage of a rare opportunity to insert a Dad Joke into a discussion about Perspectives on Psychological Science), their work really spoke to me.
They say they can identify the trend but can’t fully explain it.
Technology is an obvious suspect, since the decline coincides with the rise of texting, social media, and smartphones.
But the fact that older adults are losing words suggests something broader is going on.
My own theories:
More people are working from home, which eliminates the ambient conversation of offices and commutes.
Fewer people are going out for lunch, alone or with others.
Delivery apps remove the need to speak to anyone to get food.
Add to all that the AirPod effect—the way headphones have made it socially acceptable, or even expected, to be unreachable in public spaces where strangers used to talk.
Do all of those factors combine to explain a 28-percent drop? Does it really matter, anyway?
“When we speak less, we connect less,” those researchers put it. “With every lost word we wear away our connections with others.”
In retrospect, that’s so on-the-nose. Lead researcher Valeria Pfeifer offered a fix at the time: “If each of us just talked to one more person each day, we could reverse this trend.”
You don’t have to get a stranger’s whole life story; leave that to me.
But a few words here and there might make a difference.
A final note, which made me laugh: The Wall Street Journal ended their coverage of this story with the line: “Do you think you’re talking less than you used to? Join the conversation below.”
Good advice, for more reasons than one.
Other things worth knowing …
NBC News: The U.S. and Iran have reached an initial agreement to end the war and reopen the Strait of Hormuz. The deal includes a 60-day negotiating window on nuclear issues, with $24 billion in frozen Iranian funds to be released during that period — and a requirement for the U.S. and its allies to present reconstruction plans for Iran worth at least $300 billion.
WSJ: An emboldened Justice Department is ramping up efforts to investigate and prosecute more than four dozen of President Trump’s perceived enemies. “The entire premise of this article is laughable — the mainstream media turned a blind eye when Joe Biden weaponized his Department of Justice against his political opponents,” said White House spokeswoman Abigail Jackson.
Mediaite: UFC fighter Josh Hokit was slapped with a wave of backlash after he called former First Lady Michelle Obama a man following his match at Trump’s fight night on the White House lawn. Leading up to the event, UFC President Dana White had insisted the event was apolitical and merely a celebration of America’s 250th anniversary.
NBC News: Day 5 of the World Cup produced a string of upsets. Spain — a tournament favorite — was held to a scoreless draw by Cape Verde, the most stunning result of the tournament so far. Saudi Arabia drew 1-1 with Uruguay, and Iran tied New Zealand 2-2 in a match being played in the U.S. on the same day the war with Iran formally ended. The U.S. won its opener 4-1 against Paraguay last week and plays Australia on Friday.
Inc: Women taking GLP-1 medications like Ozempic and Wegovy were roughly 30 percent less likely to develop breast cancer than women who weren’t, according to a new study from the University of Pennsylvania.
Science Daily: Beneath our feet lies a vast hidden fungal superhighway — and scientists have now mapped it for the first time. The mycorrhizal network stretching an estimated 68 quadrillion miles connects the roots of most plants on Earth, transferring nutrients and carbon between trees and other plants. Researchers say the map reveals which forests are most dependent on the network and most vulnerable to disruption from logging and climate change.
MarketWatch: The current wave of spending by the wealthy looks so strong that companies are responding by raising prices and adopting business plans that cater to the elite — a dynamic that will make it difficult to bring inflation down. The tools the Federal Reserve uses to combat inflation typically have a more pronounced impact on low-income Americans.
Thanks for reading. I wrote about some of this at Inc.com. See you in the comments.
The anti speaking/conversation trend seems to support our loss of civility toward each other. Would people be as nasty as they are online if it all had to be done face to face? Texts have abbreviated words, comments have become snarky etc. AI is answering questions for customers. It seems as we draw deeper and deeper into “tech”, generally we are less civil. I think everyone has an interesting story! Living now in a more rural community, I do find it is easier to engage, though younger folks seem very awkward to randomly chat or even acknowledge.
I have a smallish boat marina in town and there is a spit of grass overlooking the waterfront with a shade tree and chairs. We call it the office and it invites a sit down. The breeze always finds its way there as do those looking for a chat. The thing is, there is a rule: no lying, exaggeration encouraged. After all, these folks are essentially pirates with sea stories. It has become a thing and made my little ground sacred. Regulars and transients alike always comment on the chance to get into a real conversation, unplanned and yet nourishing. This is probably my only real legacy and I have to say, I am honored to facilitate it in a climate of community.