Across the street

Did you know some people do not live near a Trader Joe's?

Sometimes life imitates parody. My latest favorite example? This long-ago headline from The Onion: “New Starbucks Opens In Rest Room Of Existing Starbucks.”

Only now, we’re talking about Trader Joe’s. And, while you can’t literally fit a grocery store in a bathroom, it comes close to that level of apparent absurdity.

To see firsthand, travel with me virtually to Sherman Oaks, California:

Trader Joe’s on the left; future (at the time) Trader Joe’s on the right.

• We’ll stop first at the Trader Joe’s that has stood since 1973 at 14119 Riverside Drive.

• Then, we’ll go directly across the street, to 14140 Riverside Drive, where in June, Trader Joe’s opened a brand new store they refer to as “Sherman Oaks, too.”

Oh, you might think — as I did when I first saw this story — they must have opened the new store to replace the old one. That one must be closing down sometime soon.

Alas, not the case. Trader Joe’s spokesperson Nakia Rohde told me via email:

“Yes, we now have two stores in Sherman Oaks across the street from each other.

…

Since Trader Joe’s began in 1967, we have been in growth mode. Some years, we grow more than others, and our goal is always to bring delicious products at great values to as many people as we can. The best way to do that is to open more stores.”

It’s a surprising choice, and customers have feelings — although they’re not exactly disappointed, as some of the TikTok videos dedicated to the news suggest.

TikTok person, not me, getting tons of views by driving to Sherman Oaks and going to a grocery store. Well, two grocery stores.

But why do this? Without more context from the company maybe we can try our hand at an explanation. A few ideas:

• The stores have different footprints, with the new one about 40% larger than the old one, and a much bigger parking lot. Maybe the correct way to think about this is more of an expansion, as opposed to a new store.

• The older one is a bit of a classic (the fifth Trader Joe’s). So there might be a nostalgia-related reason to keep it open even with a new version across the street.

• Also, Trader Joe’s is privately owned. So even if the second store cannibalized sales from the original one a bit, as long as the total profit from both exceeded the old one alone — at least, it’s all going to the same company.

Actually, one more reason, which fits in with the idea of something pulled from the The Onion: the quirkiness and added media boost from making such an unusual decision.

I doubt I’d be writing about Trader Joe’s today if all they had done was added onto the existing store, or if it had closed one down but opened a much bigger one.

But do something kind of off-the-wall like this — two supposedly competing stores owned by the same company across the street from each other — and people notice.

In context, we have to point out that the original Starbucks joke in The Onion — from 1998, by the way; “le plus ça change” and all that — is funny because it’s nearly true.

In fact, there are quite a few Starbucks locations located so close to other locations that you can probably smell the coffee from one at the other. (People on Reddit go down this rabbit hole once in a while.)

Keeping with the theme, having traveled a lot in the South, I suspected there might be some Waffle House locations that came close to being almost as close.

Here’s an example of two about .8 miles from each other in Kentucky.

And, as a native New Englander, I am fully aware that it’s impossible to be both (a) in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, and (b) far from a Dunkin’ location.

Example: Lynn, Massachusetts, where you can get a coffee and a doughnut at the Dunkin’ located at 25 Boston Street, and then walk .2 miles to get another coffee and another doughnut at the Dunkin’ at 80 Boston Street.

Just a 4 minute walk from one Dunkin’ to anotha!

I like stories like this because we can always find good takeaways:

• First, be ambitious. I won’t go as far as to say be “greedy,” but if you realize there’s more demand for what you’re selling than you can currently supply — find a way to create more supply.

• Second, be willing to compete with yourself. Heck, I’m curious to learn whether any interesting innovations will come out of this odd situation, with the two Trader Joe’s engaging in competition (hopefully friendly) for customers.

• Finally, all other things being equal, don’t be afraid to be quirky. At the very least, it gets people’s attention.

Bonus points if you can reference a 27-year-old headline from The Onion, and remember it like it was yesterday.

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7 other things worth knowing

• Texas Democrats left the state Sunday to deny the GOP a legislative quorum, part of an effort to stop Republicans from redrawing the state's congressional maps at the request of President Trump. The move deprives the Texas state Legislature of a quorum, but comes with risks for the state Democrats, including steep fines and the threat of arrest. Related: Here's an analysis of all the other states that might also wind up remapping their Congressional districts in the wake of the Texas effort. (The Hill, Roll Call)

• President Donald Trump and one of his top economic advisors on Monday stoked baseless conspiracies about federal jobs data, suggesting without evidence that Friday’s weaker-than-expected employment report had been “rigged” by federal workers bent on sabotaging the president. Trump abruptly fired Bureau of Labor Statistics Commissioner Erika McEntarfer hours after the report. (CNBC)

• Actress Loni Anderson, best known for her role as Jennifer Marlowe on the CBS sitcom WKRP in Cincinnati has died, just days before her 80th birthday. The actress' longtime publicist, Cheryl J. Kagan, said she died at a Los Angeles hospital following a "prolonged" illness. (People)

• South Korea’s military said Monday it had begun removing loudspeakers along its border with rival North Korea in a move aimed at reducing tensions. The speakers had previously been used to blast anti-North Korean propaganda across the border, but the South’s new liberal government halted the broadcasts in June in a conciliatory gesture. (Yahoo News)

• When was the last time a newspaper did a big expansion? The New York Post says it's launching a new edition in Los Angeles next year: The California Post. (Hollywood Reporter)

• Quite some time ago, I wrote about how the city of Tulsa was offering a $10,000 reward for remote workers and self-employed people to move there. I think I forgot about it to be honest, but here's the story of a couple who took them up on it, moving from California. (SF Gate)

• Who's the top dog? Wave-riding canines competed in the World Dog Surfing Championships. (NPR)

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Thanks for reading. Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash. I wrote about some of this before at Inc.com. See you in the comments.