I must assume your response re: FOGO is from personal experience. But I have a different personal experience. Having contemplated suicide, dreaming about it, and spending a lot of time thinking about it, I learned to not fear death or growing older. FOGO disappeared for me in my forties. I'm now 94 and enjoying my old age very much. Lucky me!!! Furthermore, take it from me, spending time in the past is wasted time. Life is too short for that.
I'd like to thank the Academy and a bunch of people no one has ever heard of for this wonderful award. I'm not sure what it is yet. Perhaps a share of the $1.1 billion lottery? Nah, Bill's way too much of a cheapskate for that. Seriously, thanks to everyone.
Welcome Conor! Happy that you joined and will breathe new life to Understandably.
Though I live in Northern Ontario, with the wonders of a satellite dish, I grew up in the 80's to MTV blasting most of the time in our house. Good times!
As for FOGO, I don't suffer from it though I do feel like life is very much going by at warp speed. I turned 50 this year and have never felt better so I definitely would not want to go back in time. Saying that, I don't relate to new music too much. I love many genres of music, and I love promoting artists with potential as one of my pastimes.
I look forward to reading more of your writing. Here we are enjoying a Civic Holiday in Canada. Really nice to be off today and just freestyle with no special plans.
FOGO- HA! I am a 70 year old active (rowing, pickelball, yoga, swimming, 20 acres to bush hog, volunteering) woman- never married, no kids, lots of friends. I wake up every day stiff and limping from the exercise the day before. I am thinking of how it (I) will end- should i downsize soon , where should i live when i can no longer drive, etc etc. Now THAT is scary. Tell me how to live with that?
Marla, see if you have a Council on Aging in your county or check with your county administration to see about local resources. This is assuming you reside in the U.S. Stay active and positive.
You maybe won't be able to drive a car, but you can probably drive a golf cart. My parents live on a golf course, and they drive it all the time. Some communities you can even drive to the grocery store in your cart. My dad is 84 and he doesn't drive anymore. But my mom drives. And I drive all the time when I come to visit, which is often for very long stays. They live in Hawaii. I know I'm super lucky to have an escape from the terrible Chicago winters.
I will always care about pop culture. It's my lifeblood. Even though I don't work at MTV News anymore. I tend to find movies and television to be in better shape than popular music these days. Still. there's plenty of indie rock and underground music I can listen to. It's just most of the pop music of today I think is terrible.
When I turned 70, I told myself realistically, "Well, this is the last decade of your life, so you'd better enjoy it for as long as you've got it." I started working on a "bucket list" on the assumption that the clock is ticking, and I need to cram as much life into my final days as I can. A year later, my wife was diagnosed with dementia, and now I am doing everything I can to be here to take care of her for as long as she needs me. For me, FOGO is Fear of Not Living Long Enough.
I can relate being a Gen X myself. I can’t count how many times when my friends and I talk about something like it was yesterday and then realize it was 1998 when it happen.
I related perfectly to Reality Bites when it was released
I have 17 year old twin boys and I have told them many times I wish they could travel back in time and have one small town summer in the 80’s. Pre internet and social media just driving to the lake with friends or long days taking about nothing at someone’s house while watching MTV.
I know nostalgia has blocked out some of the bad things about that time. But also we didn’t have the 24 hour news cycle so we had our own little bubble to live in.
I don’t really suffer from FOGO. I think I benefit from LORIGO (Lack of Realizing I’m Getting Old.) …or suffer from it, as some people close to me might describe my affliction. Lol
At 57, I:
- work 14 hours a day regularly
- still find time to play Genshin Impact on my phone at 4AM each morning
- exercise like a 30-yr old with good intentions but less-than-perfect consistency
- eat like a 30-yr old foodie, savoring every opportunity for a really great meal
- have Spotify playlists from 70’s to today. Love Post Malone and Dua Lipa (“…and even if I wanted to, I can’t stop…”
- brought myself from zero knowledge to “proficient” with Adobe Illustrator, Photoshop & InDesign in a month’s time so I could pull off the most important tasks my lead designer in Pakistan can, if she’s asleep or otherwise engaged.
- consider every day a learning opportunity…tech wise, spiritually, politically, financially, business wise, and about the people who are most important to me.
- Speaking of those people: Most importantly, cherish every second with my wife as well as my three grown girls, 2 of whom are under my roof (although one heads back to NYU for senior year in 2 weeks.) I’m sure some or maybe most of my LORIGO has been a way to stay connected with them.
Ignorance truly is bliss. I’m sure some of this stuff above will drive me to an early grave…because I will be like this until the day I die. But, my parents both died when they were 52…I was 17…so every day above ground is a gift, and I fully intend to live it with joy and zeal.
I enjoyed your article. And I understand your angst. I'm 74, and am distressed with others my age who have given up. Sit on the porch. Complain their life is boring. They feel irrelevant. Invisible. They long for the good old days.
I have a full-time hypnotherapy practice, and write posts and articles for the local community and on Facebook. I took courage in hand, and began daily videos (Unstuck Minute) three months ago. Plans are to start an online women's group in September/October.
Take the good with you, and keep on going. The adventure awaits!
As a pre-Vietnam era oldster whose brain is still functioning as it did in the '60s, I fully understand gerascophobia, although I don't believe I suffer from the affliction too much. I like where I am now. Life is still exciting, and fortunately, I am only forgetting small things, although thinking back, I may have always been a bit forgetful. Yeah, that's it. Anyway, I love the music of the '60s, '70's and some of the '80s, before music became mostly canned. The real guitar and drum rips were, and are, spectacular. My 21 year old son feels the same way (maybe because that is about all that I listen to except for classical music - which he loves to). Maybe it's because my wife and I homeschooled him from kindergarten. He's now a sophomore at university. Music then was mostly anti-war and civil rights protest music. If you listened to the lyrics of this music, it was very much attuned to resistance, finding a new way, and usually raw on top of fantastically moving electric guitar rips by Jimi Hendrix, the Cream (Eric Clampton), the Grateful Dead and, later into the '80s, Stevie Ray Vaughn, and so on, so many I am leaving out. Thanks to Google, Facebook and You Tube, they are still alive. And, all of the R&B - Little Richard, Bo Didley, Light'n Slim, B.B. King, etc. There is nothing like that music now. Maybe it'll come back. Let's hope.
Thank you so much for the Dad Jokes! I copied and pasted for my peeps to enjoy -- Hope that was OK.
As far as FOGO is concerned, I am THANKFUL to be growing old! There are so many things that have happened in my life that could have cut it short and did not. And for that I am grateful to God. Maybe that's not how everyone thinks, but it works for me. Life's not perfect, for sure, but I do love life and work to enjoy each day -- approach with gladness and thanksgiving in my heart and in my mind. I feel so much younger than the calendar says I am. And that's a good thing!
FOGO is a waste of time. After all what is the alternative? You need to embrace aging and take good care of your body through the years. Truthfully, I felt FOGO a lot more in my late 30's/early 40's than I do now in my 60's.
And sometimes I wonder if some of today's music is even music. It has no soul to it, just seems to be a bunch of badly dressed people gyrating around on a video. But then that has always existed. Every generation has its share of one hit wonders. Will be interesting to see how today's music holds up in 15 years.
Great newsletter today Bill. Your guest writer, Conor, wrote well about an issue that as a senior, I can assure him and everyone else, that by staying active and thinking of others will help ease you over the hump of FOGO. One more thing Conor, keep in mind that all of us are only given today. One’s tomorrow is never assured. Enjoy what you’re given today. Tomorrow will take care of itself.
Bill, the dad groaners have been enjoyed by this reader so whatever you can work out for us subscribers would be awfully nice.
Poor President Biden getting a rebound reaction from Paxlovid. Maybe the disease is worse than the cure?
Was a huge fan of Star Trek and Lt Uhura. She and the Captain shared a kiss that really broke all sorts of norms back then. So Nichell and Bill Russell are two greats and definitely credits to humanity.
Welcome to the tribe, Conor.
FOGO never really goes away. You just learn to deal with it.
Enjoy the nostalgia. It’s one of the many positive aspects of aging that makes getting older worthwhile.
I must assume your response re: FOGO is from personal experience. But I have a different personal experience. Having contemplated suicide, dreaming about it, and spending a lot of time thinking about it, I learned to not fear death or growing older. FOGO disappeared for me in my forties. I'm now 94 and enjoying my old age very much. Lucky me!!! Furthermore, take it from me, spending time in the past is wasted time. Life is too short for that.
Wow... 94! i'm glad you're living your best life.
ME TOO!!
I will continue to enjoy the nostalgia. Thanks for the welcome.
I'd like to thank the Academy and a bunch of people no one has ever heard of for this wonderful award. I'm not sure what it is yet. Perhaps a share of the $1.1 billion lottery? Nah, Bill's way too much of a cheapskate for that. Seriously, thanks to everyone.
Welcome Conor! Happy that you joined and will breathe new life to Understandably.
Though I live in Northern Ontario, with the wonders of a satellite dish, I grew up in the 80's to MTV blasting most of the time in our house. Good times!
As for FOGO, I don't suffer from it though I do feel like life is very much going by at warp speed. I turned 50 this year and have never felt better so I definitely would not want to go back in time. Saying that, I don't relate to new music too much. I love many genres of music, and I love promoting artists with potential as one of my pastimes.
I look forward to reading more of your writing. Here we are enjoying a Civic Holiday in Canada. Really nice to be off today and just freestyle with no special plans.
Thanks, Lynne, for reading!
Hey Bill, thanks for the daily newsletter. It's great!!
Missed the dad joke submission request, but thought I'd share anyway. Why do ducks have tail feathers? To cover their butt quacks!
Thanks for all you do and hope you have a great day.
FOGO- HA! I am a 70 year old active (rowing, pickelball, yoga, swimming, 20 acres to bush hog, volunteering) woman- never married, no kids, lots of friends. I wake up every day stiff and limping from the exercise the day before. I am thinking of how it (I) will end- should i downsize soon , where should i live when i can no longer drive, etc etc. Now THAT is scary. Tell me how to live with that?
Marla, see if you have a Council on Aging in your county or check with your county administration to see about local resources. This is assuming you reside in the U.S. Stay active and positive.
You maybe won't be able to drive a car, but you can probably drive a golf cart. My parents live on a golf course, and they drive it all the time. Some communities you can even drive to the grocery store in your cart. My dad is 84 and he doesn't drive anymore. But my mom drives. And I drive all the time when I come to visit, which is often for very long stays. They live in Hawaii. I know I'm super lucky to have an escape from the terrible Chicago winters.
Part of growing old is not caring about pop culture.
I will always care about pop culture. It's my lifeblood. Even though I don't work at MTV News anymore. I tend to find movies and television to be in better shape than popular music these days. Still. there's plenty of indie rock and underground music I can listen to. It's just most of the pop music of today I think is terrible.
When I turned 70, I told myself realistically, "Well, this is the last decade of your life, so you'd better enjoy it for as long as you've got it." I started working on a "bucket list" on the assumption that the clock is ticking, and I need to cram as much life into my final days as I can. A year later, my wife was diagnosed with dementia, and now I am doing everything I can to be here to take care of her for as long as she needs me. For me, FOGO is Fear of Not Living Long Enough.
I wish you both well. She is lucky to have you in her life. Appreciate every moment you have together.
The TV series Bones featured a remake of Running Up That Hill in Season 2E11 · Judas on a Pole https://www.tunefind.com/show/bones/season-2/2182 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6z-UmjTU2ZA. just sayin'.
I can relate being a Gen X myself. I can’t count how many times when my friends and I talk about something like it was yesterday and then realize it was 1998 when it happen.
I related perfectly to Reality Bites when it was released
I have 17 year old twin boys and I have told them many times I wish they could travel back in time and have one small town summer in the 80’s. Pre internet and social media just driving to the lake with friends or long days taking about nothing at someone’s house while watching MTV.
I know nostalgia has blocked out some of the bad things about that time. But also we didn’t have the 24 hour news cycle so we had our own little bubble to live in.
I know, right? You think whoa!... Nirvana is classic rock now. Or eek! Pulp Fiction came out more than 30 years ago.
Pulp Fiction-one of the top 5 movies of all time. But, that 30 number hurts my soul.
I don’t really suffer from FOGO. I think I benefit from LORIGO (Lack of Realizing I’m Getting Old.) …or suffer from it, as some people close to me might describe my affliction. Lol
At 57, I:
- work 14 hours a day regularly
- still find time to play Genshin Impact on my phone at 4AM each morning
- exercise like a 30-yr old with good intentions but less-than-perfect consistency
- eat like a 30-yr old foodie, savoring every opportunity for a really great meal
- have Spotify playlists from 70’s to today. Love Post Malone and Dua Lipa (“…and even if I wanted to, I can’t stop…”
- brought myself from zero knowledge to “proficient” with Adobe Illustrator, Photoshop & InDesign in a month’s time so I could pull off the most important tasks my lead designer in Pakistan can, if she’s asleep or otherwise engaged.
- consider every day a learning opportunity…tech wise, spiritually, politically, financially, business wise, and about the people who are most important to me.
- Speaking of those people: Most importantly, cherish every second with my wife as well as my three grown girls, 2 of whom are under my roof (although one heads back to NYU for senior year in 2 weeks.) I’m sure some or maybe most of my LORIGO has been a way to stay connected with them.
Ignorance truly is bliss. I’m sure some of this stuff above will drive me to an early grave…because I will be like this until the day I die. But, my parents both died when they were 52…I was 17…so every day above ground is a gift, and I fully intend to live it with joy and zeal.
Glenn, that was a great post. So true and enlightening in so many ways! Thank you.
Great writing Conor! Thanks Bill for sharing Conor with us! Loved the Dad jokes!
Thanks, Cindy!
Hi Connor,
I enjoyed your article. And I understand your angst. I'm 74, and am distressed with others my age who have given up. Sit on the porch. Complain their life is boring. They feel irrelevant. Invisible. They long for the good old days.
I have a full-time hypnotherapy practice, and write posts and articles for the local community and on Facebook. I took courage in hand, and began daily videos (Unstuck Minute) three months ago. Plans are to start an online women's group in September/October.
Take the good with you, and keep on going. The adventure awaits!
As a pre-Vietnam era oldster whose brain is still functioning as it did in the '60s, I fully understand gerascophobia, although I don't believe I suffer from the affliction too much. I like where I am now. Life is still exciting, and fortunately, I am only forgetting small things, although thinking back, I may have always been a bit forgetful. Yeah, that's it. Anyway, I love the music of the '60s, '70's and some of the '80s, before music became mostly canned. The real guitar and drum rips were, and are, spectacular. My 21 year old son feels the same way (maybe because that is about all that I listen to except for classical music - which he loves to). Maybe it's because my wife and I homeschooled him from kindergarten. He's now a sophomore at university. Music then was mostly anti-war and civil rights protest music. If you listened to the lyrics of this music, it was very much attuned to resistance, finding a new way, and usually raw on top of fantastically moving electric guitar rips by Jimi Hendrix, the Cream (Eric Clampton), the Grateful Dead and, later into the '80s, Stevie Ray Vaughn, and so on, so many I am leaving out. Thanks to Google, Facebook and You Tube, they are still alive. And, all of the R&B - Little Richard, Bo Didley, Light'n Slim, B.B. King, etc. There is nothing like that music now. Maybe it'll come back. Let's hope.
Thank you so much for the Dad Jokes! I copied and pasted for my peeps to enjoy -- Hope that was OK.
As far as FOGO is concerned, I am THANKFUL to be growing old! There are so many things that have happened in my life that could have cut it short and did not. And for that I am grateful to God. Maybe that's not how everyone thinks, but it works for me. Life's not perfect, for sure, but I do love life and work to enjoy each day -- approach with gladness and thanksgiving in my heart and in my mind. I feel so much younger than the calendar says I am. And that's a good thing!
FOGO is a waste of time. After all what is the alternative? You need to embrace aging and take good care of your body through the years. Truthfully, I felt FOGO a lot more in my late 30's/early 40's than I do now in my 60's.
And sometimes I wonder if some of today's music is even music. It has no soul to it, just seems to be a bunch of badly dressed people gyrating around on a video. But then that has always existed. Every generation has its share of one hit wonders. Will be interesting to see how today's music holds up in 15 years.
I give all music a fair shot. I just think we are living in a bad period right now for popular music.
Great newsletter today Bill. Your guest writer, Conor, wrote well about an issue that as a senior, I can assure him and everyone else, that by staying active and thinking of others will help ease you over the hump of FOGO. One more thing Conor, keep in mind that all of us are only given today. One’s tomorrow is never assured. Enjoy what you’re given today. Tomorrow will take care of itself.
Bill, the dad groaners have been enjoyed by this reader so whatever you can work out for us subscribers would be awfully nice.
Poor President Biden getting a rebound reaction from Paxlovid. Maybe the disease is worse than the cure?
Was a huge fan of Star Trek and Lt Uhura. She and the Captain shared a kiss that really broke all sorts of norms back then. So Nichell and Bill Russell are two greats and definitely credits to humanity.
I relate to your comment. One day at a time. It's what they tell us in AA.
So you’re a friend of Bill W too?