Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on a fence?

A: Time to get a new one!

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Where do Pirates get their hooks?

Second hand stores.

OK, I Googled dad jokes and this was one of the better ones.

What? You want another?!

I only get sick on Wednesdays. I have a weekend immune system.

Tip your server. Happy weekend.

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loved this when I was a kid, & I'm older than you by far. I've told this to many, for many years:

When did the fly fly?

When the spider spied her!

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This joke is a repeat. I read it Thursday July 28 and here it is again on Friday.

What’s up with that ? Looking for astute readers who(m) pay attention ?


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This is hard! I do Dad Jokes daily with some friends. So to pick just one is difficult. But here goes:

Why was Six afraid of Seven?

Because Seven Ate Nine.

But why did Seven eat Nine?

He heard you were supposed to have three squared meals a day!

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How does the moon cut his hair?

Eclipse it!

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What did the wall say to the other wall?

Meet me at the corner.

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My favorite for the last 30 years has been, "What did the bee say to the flower?

Open up bud."

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This has to be the worst!! Mother Skunk was having a problem with her two baby skunks named In and Out. Every time In was in, Out was out. Every time Out was in, In was out. Exasperated, she finally cornered Out and told him to go and find In. Moments later Out was back with In in tow. “How did you find In so fast?”she asked Out. “That’s easy,” Out replied,”In Stinked!”

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?

Great big holes all over Australia

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There is a Honda car on the road with a bumper sticker that says “Fenry”.

Fenry Honda

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How do you get a farm girl’s attention?

A tractor

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This was my dad‘s favorite joke when I was growing up. Pete, Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete and Pete fell out. Who was left? Repeat. Pete, Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete and Pete fell out. Who was left? Repeat…😂😂

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thanks for another enjoyable newsletter-I look forward to it every day bringing me up to speed with world events and also inspirational tidbits. Keep it up Bill!!!

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Good Bill Murphy. Thank you for the free subscription. I would like offer a joke for consideration.

What quite and smells like a carrot???

A bunny fart.

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Oh no! I pay to get less and non-payees get more. Please include the “Dad jokes” in subscribers news letter. I am a retired high school teacher and miss the jokes.

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