Lowe's (and much of the rest of retail corporations) have additional options to relieve burn-out of their public-facing staff: they could incentivize store mgmt with more payroll hours to hire additional staff and they could reverse wage stagnation by using some of their many billions of earmarked 10b-18 spend to actually pay their staff better. Better pay goes a long way to retaining performing workers, giving facility mgmt better carrots&sticks to shed deadweight and attract talent from competitors. All of this would result in better store performance and improved customer service, revolving into more customer spend. It's well past time the business world moved beyond the simplistic wrongheadedness of Friedman's 'owners are the only stakeholders that matter' thesis and abandon the greed-based McKinsey consultation advice on corporate management. The shareholder matters, but so does the customer, the employee, the vendor and the community. Pay matters - Lowe's and other retailers can share much more of the wealth and net profits with their workforce and still satisfy the greed and tax avoidance of the buyback pushers.
I have to say I'm surprised by the request of the American Airlines flight attendants to impose a 2 alcoholic-drink maximum in economy class. With the time it takes to pass the beverage cart around with everyone having to pay their meals, snacks, and drinks with credit cards (takes forever, bring back cash), I would think it would be very challenging to get past 2 drinks in the first place. I don't drink much at all myself, just an observation I've made of the inefficiencies in flying brought upon by the increased reliance on technology, not always a good thing, eh? The airlines indicate they don't want the flight attendants handling cash. Well, if you can't trust your employees to do their basic functions, you have bigger issues I say.
Lawn is truly a four-letter word environmentally. Am going to be seeding in red clover wherever I can because that is what the bees and butterflies prefer.
Love your writing. And the dad jokes. I tell dad jokes to an audience of disabled adults with my disabled son. None are original. We should all have a list ready to go for emergencies. Here is my ongoing list:
Dad Jokes
- [ ] We all know about Murphy’s Law: Anything that can go wrong will go wrong. But have you heard of Cole’s Law? It’s thinly sliced cabbage.
- [ ] What do you call a cat that drinks lemonade? A sourpuss
- [ ] What side of a church do the trees grow on? The outside.
- [ ] My wife says I only have 2 faults. 1) I don’t listen and 2) I don’t remember
- [ ] What is green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table
- [ ] Did you hear about the big sale on Legos? People are lining up for blocks!
- [ ] What is the scariest tree? BamBOO!
- [ ] Why can’t a farmer keep secrets on his farm? Because the corn has ears, the potatoes have eyes, and the beans stalk.
- [ ] What do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody knows!
- [ ] What do you call an American bee? A USB
- [ ] What’s made of leather and sounds like a sneeze? A shoe!
- [ ] How do you get a farm girl to marry you? A tractor.
- [ ] I’m writing a book about hurricanes and tornadoes. It is only a draft at the moment.
- [ ] played ‘dad’ instead of ‘dead’ when the bear attacked. Now it can ride a bike without training wheels.
- [ ] My wife is blaming me for ruining her birthday. That’s ridiculous! I didn’t even know it was her birthday!
- [ ] I don’t mean to brag, but cashiers are always checking me out!
- [ ] What did the baby corn say to the momma corn? Where is popcorn?
- [ ] Did you hear about the bakery that burned down? Their business is toast.
- [ ] Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson.
- [ ] What do you call a pig with laryngitis? Disgruntled.
- [ ] Writing my name in cursive is my signature move
- [ ] Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm.
- [ ] Just so everyone’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.
- [ ] I lost my job as a stage designer. I left without making a scene.
- [ ] Never buy flowers from a monk. Only you can prevent florist friars.
- [ ] How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced? A buccaneer.
- [ ] My friends and I have named our band ‘Duvet’. It’s a cover band.
- [ ] Bono and The Edge walk into a Dublin bar and the bartender says, “Oh no, not U2 again.”
- [ ] Prison is just one word to you, but for some people, it’s a whole sentence.
- [ ] Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person’s walk, and the result was staggering.
- [ ] I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
- [ ] I got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows, and nuts. I won’t lie, it was a rocky road.
- [ ] What do you say to comfort a friend who’s struggling with grammar? There, their, they’re.
- [ ] I went to the toy store and asked the assistant where the Schwarznegger dolls are and he replied, “Aisle B, back.”
- [ ] What did the surgeon say to the patient who insisted on closing up their own incision? Suture self.
- [ ] I’ve started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It’s all about raisin awareness.
- [ ] They’re building a mirror factory in my town. I could see myself working there.
- [ ] Why can’t you play cards in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs.
- [ ] Why was the baby jalapeño shivering? He was a little chili!
- [ ] Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot. Because you can catch a hold.
- [ ] The doctor told me I’m going deaf. That news was hard for me to hear!
- [ ] It doesn’t matter If you’re tall, short, fat, thin, rich, poor. At the end of the day..... it’s night!
- [ ] I wear two pants when I golf just in case I get a hole-in-one.
- [ ] Why was the horse so happy? Because he lived in a stable environment.
- [ ] I thought it was the dryer that was making my clothes shrink. It turns out, it was the refrigerator.
- [ ] What do you call a cow during an earthquake? A milkshake.
- [ ] What do you call a cow with a twitch? A: "Beef Jerky!"
- [ ] Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account? They were prime mates.
- [ ] Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
- [ ] I named my dog 6 miles so I can tell people that I walk 6 miles every day.
- [ ] Why didn't the zombie go to school? He felt rotten!
- [ ] What do you say when you're having dinner with a skeleton? Bone-appetit!
- [ ] What did the vampire say to his spouse? It was love at first bite!
- [ ] I tried my hand at counterfeiting, but I never made any real money.
- [ ] When my son’s team won the local church's football tournament, the goalkeeper invited the two of us for tea afterwards. It was a case of Father, Son and Goalie Host.
- [ ] I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes. Now I have Heinzsight .
- [ ] My husband was furious at me for kicking dropped ice cubes under the refrigerator. But now it's just water under the fridge
- [ ] Yesterday I yelled into a colander. What happened? I strained my voice.
- [ ] I removed all the fattening food from my house. It was delicious.
- [ ] A woodpecker would probably describe petrified wood as being 'impeccable'.
- [ ] Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
- [ ] What do you call a dinosaur fart? A blast from the past.
- [ ] What’s up computers favorite snacks? Micro chips
- [ ] I decided to stop calling the bathroom the “John” and renamed it the “Jim”. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning
- [ ] I once had a conversation with a dolphin. We just clicked.
- [ ] What does a house wear? Address.
- [ ] Two ships collided. One was carrying blue paint and the other red paint. All the passengers were marooned
- [ ] Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!
- [ ] What do you call a crocodile who is a detective? An investi-gator!
- [ ] I went to the zoo yesterday and saw a baguette in a cage. The Zookeeper said it was bread in captivity.....
- [ ] What did farmer say to his cow at night? It’s “pasture” bedtime.!
- [ ] My grandson asked if I could put his shoe on. I said “I don’t think they would fit me.”
- [ ] Did you hear the gossip about the peanut butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it!
- [ ] A Giant fly attacked the police department! They had to call in the SWAT team!
- [ ] Dad: “I don’t trust those trees.” Son says, “why not, Dad?” Dad says, “They seem kind of shady!”
- [ ] What is made out of leather and sounds love me a sneeze? A SHOE!
- [ ] Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin!
- [ ] Why couldn’t the sailors play cards? Because the captain was standing on the deck!
- [ ] A friend of mine went bald years ago, but he still carries a comb. He just can’t part with it.
- [ ] Midwives deserve a lot of respect. They really help people out.
- [x] What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything!
I know the airlines also make money from bar sales but think that 2 drinks on a short flight is plenty. After all, who know how many drinks the passengers have imbibed upon in the airport lounges before boarding? Two more may just put them over the top!
Love the train story.
Maybe some day you could write about the Carnegies family (if you haven’t).
Lowe's (and much of the rest of retail corporations) have additional options to relieve burn-out of their public-facing staff: they could incentivize store mgmt with more payroll hours to hire additional staff and they could reverse wage stagnation by using some of their many billions of earmarked 10b-18 spend to actually pay their staff better. Better pay goes a long way to retaining performing workers, giving facility mgmt better carrots&sticks to shed deadweight and attract talent from competitors. All of this would result in better store performance and improved customer service, revolving into more customer spend. It's well past time the business world moved beyond the simplistic wrongheadedness of Friedman's 'owners are the only stakeholders that matter' thesis and abandon the greed-based McKinsey consultation advice on corporate management. The shareholder matters, but so does the customer, the employee, the vendor and the community. Pay matters - Lowe's and other retailers can share much more of the wealth and net profits with their workforce and still satisfy the greed and tax avoidance of the buyback pushers.
Excellent writing, as usual.
I have to say I'm surprised by the request of the American Airlines flight attendants to impose a 2 alcoholic-drink maximum in economy class. With the time it takes to pass the beverage cart around with everyone having to pay their meals, snacks, and drinks with credit cards (takes forever, bring back cash), I would think it would be very challenging to get past 2 drinks in the first place. I don't drink much at all myself, just an observation I've made of the inefficiencies in flying brought upon by the increased reliance on technology, not always a good thing, eh? The airlines indicate they don't want the flight attendants handling cash. Well, if you can't trust your employees to do their basic functions, you have bigger issues I say.
Lawn is truly a four-letter word environmentally. Am going to be seeding in red clover wherever I can because that is what the bees and butterflies prefer.
Love your writing. And the dad jokes. I tell dad jokes to an audience of disabled adults with my disabled son. None are original. We should all have a list ready to go for emergencies. Here is my ongoing list:
Dad Jokes
- [ ] We all know about Murphy’s Law: Anything that can go wrong will go wrong. But have you heard of Cole’s Law? It’s thinly sliced cabbage.
- [ ] What do you call a cat that drinks lemonade? A sourpuss
- [ ] What side of a church do the trees grow on? The outside.
- [ ] My wife says I only have 2 faults. 1) I don’t listen and 2) I don’t remember
- [ ] What is green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table
- [ ] Did you hear about the big sale on Legos? People are lining up for blocks!
- [ ] What is the scariest tree? BamBOO!
- [ ] Why can’t a farmer keep secrets on his farm? Because the corn has ears, the potatoes have eyes, and the beans stalk.
- [ ] What do you call a man with no body and no nose? Nobody knows!
- [ ] What do you call an American bee? A USB
- [ ] What’s made of leather and sounds like a sneeze? A shoe!
- [ ] How do you get a farm girl to marry you? A tractor.
- [ ] I’m writing a book about hurricanes and tornadoes. It is only a draft at the moment.
- [ ] played ‘dad’ instead of ‘dead’ when the bear attacked. Now it can ride a bike without training wheels.
- [ ] My wife is blaming me for ruining her birthday. That’s ridiculous! I didn’t even know it was her birthday!
- [ ] I don’t mean to brag, but cashiers are always checking me out!
- [ ] What did the baby corn say to the momma corn? Where is popcorn?
- [ ] Did you hear about the bakery that burned down? Their business is toast.
- [ ] Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson.
- [ ] What do you call a pig with laryngitis? Disgruntled.
- [ ] Writing my name in cursive is my signature move
- [ ] Why do bees stay in their hives during winter? Swarm.
- [ ] Just so everyone’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.
- [ ] I lost my job as a stage designer. I left without making a scene.
- [ ] Never buy flowers from a monk. Only you can prevent florist friars.
- [ ] How much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced? A buccaneer.
- [ ] My friends and I have named our band ‘Duvet’. It’s a cover band.
- [ ] Bono and The Edge walk into a Dublin bar and the bartender says, “Oh no, not U2 again.”
- [ ] Prison is just one word to you, but for some people, it’s a whole sentence.
- [ ] Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person’s walk, and the result was staggering.
- [ ] I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
- [ ] I got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows, and nuts. I won’t lie, it was a rocky road.
- [ ] What do you say to comfort a friend who’s struggling with grammar? There, their, they’re.
- [ ] I went to the toy store and asked the assistant where the Schwarznegger dolls are and he replied, “Aisle B, back.”
- [ ] What did the surgeon say to the patient who insisted on closing up their own incision? Suture self.
- [ ] I’ve started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It’s all about raisin awareness.
- [ ] They’re building a mirror factory in my town. I could see myself working there.
- [ ] Why can’t you play cards in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs.
- [ ] Why was the baby jalapeño shivering? He was a little chili!
- [ ] Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot. Because you can catch a hold.
- [ ] The doctor told me I’m going deaf. That news was hard for me to hear!
- [ ] It doesn’t matter If you’re tall, short, fat, thin, rich, poor. At the end of the day..... it’s night!
- [ ] I wear two pants when I golf just in case I get a hole-in-one.
- [ ] Why was the horse so happy? Because he lived in a stable environment.
- [ ] I thought it was the dryer that was making my clothes shrink. It turns out, it was the refrigerator.
- [ ] What do you call a cow during an earthquake? A milkshake.
- [ ] What do you call a cow with a twitch? A: "Beef Jerky!"
- [ ] Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account? They were prime mates.
- [ ] Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
- [ ] I named my dog 6 miles so I can tell people that I walk 6 miles every day.
- [ ] Why didn't the zombie go to school? He felt rotten!
- [ ] What do you say when you're having dinner with a skeleton? Bone-appetit!
- [ ] What did the vampire say to his spouse? It was love at first bite!
- [ ] I tried my hand at counterfeiting, but I never made any real money.
- [ ] When my son’s team won the local church's football tournament, the goalkeeper invited the two of us for tea afterwards. It was a case of Father, Son and Goalie Host.
- [ ] I accidentally rubbed ketchup in my eyes. Now I have Heinzsight .
- [ ] My husband was furious at me for kicking dropped ice cubes under the refrigerator. But now it's just water under the fridge
- [ ] Yesterday I yelled into a colander. What happened? I strained my voice.
- [ ] I removed all the fattening food from my house. It was delicious.
- [ ] A woodpecker would probably describe petrified wood as being 'impeccable'.
- [ ] Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin.
- [ ] What do you call a dinosaur fart? A blast from the past.
- [ ] What’s up computers favorite snacks? Micro chips
- [ ] I decided to stop calling the bathroom the “John” and renamed it the “Jim”. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning
- [ ] I once had a conversation with a dolphin. We just clicked.
- [ ] What does a house wear? Address.
- [ ] Two ships collided. One was carrying blue paint and the other red paint. All the passengers were marooned
- [ ] Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs!
- [ ] What do you call a crocodile who is a detective? An investi-gator!
- [ ] I went to the zoo yesterday and saw a baguette in a cage. The Zookeeper said it was bread in captivity.....
- [ ] What did farmer say to his cow at night? It’s “pasture” bedtime.!
- [ ] My grandson asked if I could put his shoe on. I said “I don’t think they would fit me.”
- [ ] Did you hear the gossip about the peanut butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it!
- [ ] A Giant fly attacked the police department! They had to call in the SWAT team!
- [ ] Dad: “I don’t trust those trees.” Son says, “why not, Dad?” Dad says, “They seem kind of shady!”
- [ ] What is made out of leather and sounds love me a sneeze? A SHOE!
- [ ] Why are skeletons so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin!
- [ ] Why couldn’t the sailors play cards? Because the captain was standing on the deck!
- [ ] A friend of mine went bald years ago, but he still carries a comb. He just can’t part with it.
- [ ] Midwives deserve a lot of respect. They really help people out.
- [x] What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything!
Great story today, as usually. Really enjoyed this one. It brought all the feels. And highlighted what is good in humanity. Thanks for sharing this.
It took years to get grass out of my life. https://kieranbullshit.com/2018/12/29/all-my-grass-is-plastic/
One time as a sugar hungry child I shared my Halloween candy with my greedy brothers. Surely that counts, right?
I know the airlines also make money from bar sales but think that 2 drinks on a short flight is plenty. After all, who know how many drinks the passengers have imbibed upon in the airport lounges before boarding? Two more may just put them over the top!
Thank you for sharing such an inspiring story.
Amen! Every day is a test of one thing or another. Every. Single. Day.
And we get to decide on the spot, in the moment, how to react to that given day's test(s).